OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
