I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
