I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Randomize
