she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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