Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
