you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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