Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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