I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
