I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize