I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
