dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
