I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
