Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize