This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
