My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
