He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
