yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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