Whod you bang
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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