Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
oh god the rape fog is back!
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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