I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
