i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
