Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
