I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I deserve this hangover.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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