call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
