Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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