He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize