Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
