some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Oh god it's open bar.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
