btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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