I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
