Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize