hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I lost the right to judge tonight
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
