ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Randomize