This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
