Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
