I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
