I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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