I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
the condom got lost in my hair
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
