I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
