I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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