Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
