Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
