He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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