I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
he puts the penis in happiness.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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