hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
