Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
