Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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