Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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