arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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