Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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